{{SIGH}} What a day!

The Good, The Bad and the Absolutely Adorable!
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Rheumatoid Arthritis sucks
I went to the Rheumatologist this morning. At my last appointment, we discussed different medication options for me. Anyone who knows me, knows I am silly and care-free and just plain fun. (usually). Well, over the past year, I've been in too much pain to move. Or I've been too drained from my medications to participate in life. The Orencia infusions I've been receiving monthly have been working quite well. My histoplasmosis has not flared up (I'm not blind). My joint swelling, inflammation and most of the pain is gone. But my quality of life isn't good enough for me. I think it hit me when my friend Mandi said "you're not as fun as you used to be" and when I went out with Shasta I sat and couldn't even dance a whole song. My left arm was locked up last week and I missed two days of work. I slept approximately 35 hours in two days. I had my infusion on Friday and still had pain this weekend. We were in Fargo this weekend because my Grandma (mom's mom) is moving to a wonderful retirement community and some family heirlooms needed to come home with me. We also went up to the hospital to see my grandpa (dad's dad). He is doing better in that his surgical site is healing well, but he's still got a long haul ahead of him. It's been a very stressful time in my family. But, I digress. Meds are working, but not good enough. So today I asked the doctor if I can try something else. Again, we go through my options. With the histoplasmosis lingering in the shadows, it's a matter of trying to weigh the options and choose the lesser of all evils. There are plenty of options, but I need something that will work for ME and my lifestyle. I can't committ to two pills a day. I have cut my pills down to 6 or 7 a day. I liked the monthly infusions because I can't miss that dose! Well, the new meds I'll be trying is in the TNF-inhibitor family. It's another weekly shot. I will start that in a month after this round of Orencia is done. SO...long story short, it's going to be another 6 months before I really know if it works or if I have to switch again. I hurt and I'm tired and I don't even care how much it costs (my insurance company). The Orencia cost $3,000 per infusion. The new one will cost about $500 per month. And, of course, insurance denied the new one. It must be standard because if a human being looked at that it would be a no-brainer! Oh well, like I said, I have a month.

Fibromyalgia
It's a new one for me. The doctor thinks I have it. I am still on the fence. I know the professionals claim it's a letigimate disease, but it's so hard for me to grasp. It's too many people claiming to be in pain. Sniff Sniff. Cry baby. There's no inflammatory response, no laboratory or radiological confirmation. No actual sound proof this disease even exists. It's nerve and muscle pain. My doctor says RA and Fibromyalgia are frequently found together. So, like I said, I'm still on the fence here. I will try the new pill and see if it helps. It's supposed to help me sleep better. So I don't sleep all the time. We'll see. I'm apprehensive to say the least.

can I trade this body in for one that works?!

While in Sioux Falls, I went to see Crystal and her two beautiful kiddos. So, the trip wasn't entirely awful and depressing!


Super Christian to the Rescue!!!
Here's one cutie pie who had fun showing off his big muscles and flying from the footstool to me on the couch!! The last time I saw this little man, he was months old. Now he's 2 1/2!! Last time I saw Crystal, it was a Saturday and so Christian was with his grandparents. So it was really fun to play with him today!




(Crystal, please don't kill me for accidentally getting you in this picture)

Christian looks so much like his daddy! I haven't seen Matt in several years, so I am excited to see him again, too! But I know that doesn't even compare to how he and his family feels!! Welcome Home (this week) Matt!!!!

Pretty Princess!! Reach out and touch someone! ET Phone Home! haha!! How about if I just pick her up and kiss her sweet little face?! PERFECT!! This is Miss Sarah, who is about to celebrate her 1st birthday!! It's been a few weeks since I last saw her and she just grows too fast! I had to show off my pictures to Dennis because we just love her!

I wish I could have gotten pictures of her teeth! She has such a beautiful little smile and she has her two top teeth now too!! I think she looks like her mama.